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Now you can be fined 601€ EACH for drinking at home in Mojacar!

A group of youths have been fined 601€ EACH for quietly drinking and playing cards at their apartment in Mojacar.

As if the stupid fine of 500€ each levied recently against some youths for drinking water on Mojacar beach wasn’t bad enough, the local police have surpassed themselves and gone into a private apartment to fine a group of youths for drinking at home.

According to the complaint filed by the lawyer for the youths, the group were in their apartment when, shortly before midnight, they were visited by a local police patrol. The police explained that the youths were playing music and told them to switch it off, as silence is to be observed in Mojacar between the hours of 10pm and 8am.

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Spanish TV goes off in 2015 and it’ll cost you 20€ to keep watching!

Only two months after shutting down nine TV stations “because of lack of space on the spectrum”, the Ministry in charge of TV’s has announced they’ll allow five new TV stations to open up.

But, and this is fun, it means every TV set in Spain is going to have to be reprogrammed, or you won’t get a signal.

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Home being demolished in Albanchez

Illegal homes blow – “reinterpretation” of law put off due to holidays

The Spanish legal term prescripción doesn’t have a direct UK translation, despite it being such a useful get out of jail free card.

It means “to fall outside of the statue of limitations”, and what that means is that whatever criminal offence you’ve committed, if you keep quiet about it for long enough, you can no longer be prosecuted.

For example, let us assume you go into your local friendly supermarket and “lift” a jamón serrano. Since the jamón is worth under 500€ you’re not going to get into penal trouble anyway, but that’s a different story. If you keep quiet about it for six months and a day, you can then go to the media and boast about it, safe in the knowledge that your falta has prescrito and the law can’t touch you.

Which is why a number of these supermarkets employ an alternate security / justice system, known as Ramón and his baseball bat. But that’s another story. Continue reading

fiesta santiago turre 2012 party turre fiestas

Turre PSOE: The new fountain is a cover for massive corruption

The new fountain construction in Turre is actually a front for a massive bit of corruption in favour of the councillor for building, alledged the opposition PSOE party today.

You’ll remember that Turre last year had a vote for a new design for their old fuente morisco. That’s the ancient fountain behind the community centre, on the bit of scrubland blocked off with some metal sidings. If, when walking down the main avenue, just below the new heladeria, you have ever fallen into a dry water channel, that’s the old runoff that took the water down to the fields by the river.

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Spanish employment figures are contracts, not people admits government

The government has admitted finally that yes, when they talk about people in employment, they’re actually talking bollocks – they mean employment contracts and so anyone with two jobs is being counted twice.

The admission came after a tabled question in Congress by the UPyD party asking for clarification.

What this means is that when the government talks about there being 16,950,000 people working in Spain, they actually mean there are 16,950,000 active work contracts under the general labour scheme. Continue reading


Santiago fiesta next week in Turre

It’s what used to be known as the gitano fiesta, but has now been re-branded as the Fiestas de Santiago el Apostol in an attempt to market it to the guiris.

When we were kids we weren’t welcomed up there, but times have changed, and no gitano is too proud to strum his guitar for a lovely lady, or if no lovely lady is around, some daft yet wealthy tourists.

You’ll hear the caterwauling of the flamenco all night long next week – flamenco isn’t something the natives round here know much about, despite Polansky’s delusions about his workers in the 80′s stopping work occasionally to reel off an impromptu copla or two. Far more likely he witnessed the disturbance of a wasps nest.

Here’s the schedule of events, courtesy of the Turre townhall:

Día 24 de Julio de 2014 /  24 de julio

19:00 h. Juegos infantiles. / Kid games.

20:30 h. Concurso Crónicas Carnívoras /  “Man vs Food” competition.

22,00 h. Proyección: Orígenes y Tradiciones olvidadas de Turre Viejo /  Film: “Origen y tradiciones olvidadas de Turre Viejo”.

23,00 h. Concurso de baile. /  Dance competition.

00,00 h. Fiesta Jahr 60-70-80. /  1960, 1970 y 1980′s dance.

Día 25 de Julio /  25 de julio

19,30 h. Cintas infantiles. /  Kids ribbon race.

21,00 h. Misa Flamenca y Procesión. /  Mass, with Procession and flamenco.

23,00 h. Pregón y Coronación. /  Festival pregón and the Coronation.

Verbena y una continuacion. /  More flamenco style dancing

Día 26 de Julio de 2014 /  26 de julio

21,30 h. V Certamen de Cante Flamenco “Las Fraguas” de Turre (Selección 2a). /  Turre Fifth Flamenco competition “Las Fraguas” (second selection).

Official poster of the gitano fiesta 2014

Official poster of the gitano fiesta 2014

Camino Tapa 2014

Turre Tapas Route 2014 kicks off

The Turre Tapas Route 2014 kicks off on the 24th of July and runs until the 10th of August.

Local bars and restaurants will be serving up their special favourite dishes, and residents can vote for their favourite tapas.

You can also participate in a raffle – get at least 7 stamps on your Tapas Passport and drop it off to enter into a free raffle to win a Weekend away. (It doesn’t say where).

Pick up your free passport from the townhall or any participating restaurant.

Camino Tapa 2014The townhall is also organising a series of events throughout the route such as

Fiestas de Santiago, el Certamen de Flamenco, Torneos de Tenis, Maratón de Aerobic, Zumba, Espectáculo Danza del Vientre, Concierto de la Banda de Música Municipal de Turre, Día de la Bicicleta y como novedad la  Feria Gastronómica en el Encuentro de Turreros con la Noche en Blanco y Noche de Rock!



Mojacar launches smartphone app

Mojacar townhall has launched a virtual tour office for your smartphone.

With it, you can gets historical information, tourist guides and snippets of information as you wander about the place.

You can also scan the fancy new QR codes that have been put up on signs at interesting points, and that will instruct your phone to download an audioguide to explain what you’re looking at. 90583_64478_Pegatina-informativa-de-la-nueva-aplicacion_G

Get it from Google play, the Apple market or scan the QR code above off your screen.

QR codes are the most wasted piece of new technology, which are always being seized upon by the non-tech savvy. The idea is that they are 2D barcodes which encode a lot of information, such as instructions to your phone to download and play an audioguide off the internet. The trouble is that neither Android nor Apple include a native QR reader in their systems, meaning you have to download an app to read them, and if you don’t understand that (and many people don’t or can’t be bothered) the whole system is a waste of time.

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